Approximately 54% of the email we get includes offers to enlarge our cocks to the size of a baseball bat, and since I don’t possess one of those, I promptly forward them to the boys. Another 45% or so include a spicy stew of utter crap - offers to exchange links (save it and just link), emails declaring yours truly to be a freak (thank you), and frantic tips about female starlets showing their boobies. As cliché as this sounds, emails can break or make a day around these parts. Rarely do they perform the latter task, but I must share one that made me giggle last week:

“Agent Bedhead continues to brighten my dreary existence in this corporate dungeon. Except when you post teh gay beach pics of Matthew MacCaughnahehey. It’s like rubbing salt in an open wound since my wife is all a twitter about him. I go into a violent rage and start blowing bubbles in my coffee, crumpling paper and breaking pencils. I’m crazy like that.”

While I’d like to go ahead and post a picture of MacCaughnahehey, I do have some compassion for a guy who tossed a compliment this way, so here is a Kitler instead:

I’m not a cat person at all, but aren’t these Kitlers just fucking cute as hell? Sort of in an Emcee of Cabaret sort of way.

Clap, clap, clap!

No MacCaughnaheyhey posts until at least tomorrow. Damn, I’m smooth.