In my experience, all sincere apologies should be handed out sparingly, lest one’s contrition becomes a routine, insincere, and altogether disregarded offering. In other words, if you ever receive an apology from me, you’d best frame that sucker, for it’s not likely to ever happen again.

In contrast, Alec Baldwin does not believe in moderation, yet he cannot bear to witness the effects of his own words. He doesn’t even learn anything from these experiences. Instead, Alec makes a tiresome practice of tripping over himself by issuing PR-tainted apologies. Hell, even when the general public had all but forgotten the whole Ireland scandal, for which he’d famously bent over and grabbed his ankles, Alec perisisted in evoking swine imagery and blaming Earl.

Now, Alec Baldwin has uttered another politically incorrect sentiment, and, predicably, he has reacted to dissent by recanting what should have been brushed away as a humorous throwaway statement:

I’d like to offer an apology and a clarification to remarks I made recently.

While on the David Letterman program, I joked that I might need a “mail-order bride” to achieve the goal of having more children in my life. I believe that most people understood that this was a joke and took it as such. (A dated reference, no doubt, and another sign of my advancing age.) However, I do apologize to anyone who took offense. The comments of some Philippine government officials come as no surprise to me, either. Even the one by a former action film star-turned-Senator who beckoned me to come to the Philippines so he could “beat” me over my comment.

What a pussy! If you’re gonna say something in such a public forum, you’d damn well better own it. Otherwise, keep your rucking mouth shut.