According to Marlon Brooks, a Ludlow, Norfolk farmer, the most successful method at terrifying English pigeons is by way of his Amy Winehouse scarecrow:

With her trademark beehive and tattoos, and clutching a cigarette and bottle of booze, Marlon reckons Amy should win another award – for services to the farming industry.

“The pigeons are terrified, they’re sitting up on the telephone wires too scared to come into the field which is brilliant. Every farmer needs an Amy scarecrow,” he said. “She’s the best scarecrow we’ve ever had and she’s doing a brilliant job. In fact she’s doing a better job scaring the birds than she is singing at the moment. I’d be happy to offer her a full time job if she needs one when the singing is over”. [sic]

Marlon also disclosed that one of his pub mates, while presumably drunk, came up with the idea of fashioning a Winehouse scarecrow because “nothing was as scary as Amy.” Next up for Marlon — companion Pete Doherty and Blake Fielder-Civil scarecrows.

Oh, but that’s not all, mates:

Left: In the Yorkshire village of Methley, a second Winehouse scarecrow has proven quite useful to scare off all sorts of fowl (and, more than likely, Englishmen as well) from the fields.

Right: Winehouse’s likeness is quite popular among farmers these days, for this third Winehouse scarecrow took 2nd prize in an unnamed scarecrow competition. If this one had been accessorized with booze and ciggies, that probably would have swayed the contest quite brilliantly.

Two out of three ain’t bad.