Britney Spears MILF and pop culture’s most eligible bachelorette or not?

By Phineas G. in Britney Spears, Letterman

Just a day after revealing her surgeon’s latest work of art and a couple of weeks at the gym on David Letterman’s show last night TMZ announces that Britney has decided to drop at least another 200 pounds of dead weight.

TMZ obtained the legal papers, filed today in Los Angeles County Superior Court, citing “irreconcilable differences.” In her petition, Spears asks for both legal and physical custody of the couple’s two children, one-year old Sean Preston and two-month old Jayden James, with Federline getting reasonable visitation rights.

As for money, sources tell TMZ the couple, who married in Oct. 2004, has an iron-clad prenup. Not surprisingly, Spears is waiving her right to spousal support. She’s also asking the judge to make each party pay their own attorney’s fees.

Sources tell TMZ there was no single reason for Britney pulling the plug, rather, it was “a string of events.”

Poor K-Fed, he’s screwed. Well financially he’s screwed, career wise that horse never left the gate. Anybody seen the line on how long it’ll take K-Fed to be back in the trailer park where he belongs? I’m betting on six months.

I don’t really think it’s a coincidence Britney “did” Letterman last night. She subtly announced that she’s back. Well once she gets her boobies back to their proper pre-milk-producing-days height she’ll be back.

I realize the Ms. Spears doesn’t have raw sexuality emanating from her pours like Kate Hudson and Angelina Jolie, but her latest appearance on Letterman shows that she’s almost has her pre-child-birthin’ figure back. Is Britney hoping to climb to the top of the ranks in MILFability? I realize she’ll never have the Lesbian-For-A-Day-With-Angelina draw so ladies, y’all keep quiet (like that’ll happen).

The question everyone is wondering and nobody is asking. If you escaped from parents’ basement and had a full three minutes of unbridled passion with Britney would you consider it to be a major accomplishment or would you do the walk of shame?

You remember the walk of shame from your college days when you were out doing things, and people, you shouldn’t have?

In closing let’s just hope that Cletus Federline didn’t leave Britney with a funk that Ajax won’t take off.

More pics to help you judge her MILFness here.



10 comments

mr. atoz

Damn you, Phin, you beat me by maybe three minutes on this story.
:evil:

Seriously, this is the ultimate in kicking K-Fed when he’s down. I hope the guy doesn’t do anything rash or stupid, but it certainly wouldn’t be out of character.

11.07.06 | 3:59 pm
richj

Should we be expecting the retaliatory Kfed/Brit sex tape to surface on the internets before too long? Kfed may need a couple extra minutes of fame.

11.07.06 | 4:17 pm

Yeah!!! K-Fed is history. She deserves better and so do the children:smile:

11.07.06 | 4:24 pm

I am shocked to learn of the breakdown of this marriage. I thought they would go the distance. I was wrong.

11.07.06 | 6:36 pm
ken

“getting reasonable visitation rights” snort… yeah, let’s see how many times he actually visits them.

Expect KFed to be on some reality show for celebrity has-beens and almost-beens in 2007.

Never been into Brit in that way. Or any other way, actually. But MILF’s looking pretty good on her. I may have to re-evaluate…

11.07.06 | 7:18 pm

I don’t think getting dumped by Britney Spears is like regular getting dumped. There’s a whole cascade of loveliness in store for Mr. Federline as he begins his descent into obscurity. It won’t take more than a few thousand bucks a month to sustain his “beer and pizza by the pool” lifestyle. And he’ll have that. It behooves the Spears organization to keep this guy afloat. When this type of ex hits the skids, the first thing they do is go to the tabloids and all sorts of secret pictures and voice message recordings and letters start to turn up for cash. This bozo will be kept. And in his keptness, there will be lots of sex with strippers and other pleasures attendant to being “The Former Mr. Britney Spears”. Do not feel sorry for him. Have you seen what strippers in Hollywood look like? This divorce may actually raise the quality of Federline’s take-home, especially as busy as Britney gets, what with all that rehearsing and working-out, lol.

11.08.06 | 2:00 am
serpentineshel

She’s too young still to be a MILF. Early 30’s is when you look forward to that.

11.08.06 | 8:23 am
serpentineshel

a P.S. if you don’t mind: MILF status doesn’t have just to do with having kids and looking hot. It’s the nuance..and that comes with a little “aging”. ‘Ya know…like Angelina.

11.08.06 | 8:26 am
slug

As much as I hope K-Fed fades very far back into obscurity, there is, as I posted a day or so ago, some joy I get in seeing what this idiot will do next to cement himself even further as the all-time champion of making yourself look like a useless waste of skin. As for his singing ‘ability’, he makes Vanilla Ice look like Luciano Pavarotti. I would rather listen to the William Hung Christmas Album until my ears bled.

11.08.06 | 12:18 pm

Bye Bye Rummy…

UPDATE: Whoa! I’m sensing a trend: first KFed gets canned, then Rummy, now………..MacGuy too? Speaker Pelosi, will your partisan jihadic bloodletting know no end? Although, if she can claim credit for getting Brit to dump KFed, we might be……

11.08.06 | 3:40 pm
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