Alvin and the Chipmunks are startnig to show up on this blog so often that we should probably start charging rent to the nasty little rodent gangbangers. First, we bemoaned the approach of the Chipmunks movie. Then, the Agent gave it a nasty review. And, as usual, we greatly overestimated the public’s taste. Alvin and the Chipmunks has raked in more than $177 million since its release, so in retrospect Jason Lee’s decision to play Dave Seville makes him look whorish like a fox. And you can expect to see him back in the same role in the sequel. Oh yes, there will be sequels.

It’s rumored that the sequel will feature the Chipettes—three young bitches (or whatever you call female chipmunks) who were added to the TV series in the Eighties. Matthew Gray Gubler, the voice of Theodore, has said he’d like to see the Chipettes naked, which would be a felony offense in most jurisdictions. Personally, I’d be happy if they left out the Chipettes and threw the Bratz into the mix—raising chipmunks for a class project, maybe, or training the boys to perform petty shoplifting. Hilarity probably would not ensue, but the project would have the virtue of combining two lousy sequels into ninety minutes of epic unwatchability.