Cristiano Ronaldo, the completely hetero World Cup Gay Icon, has confessed that his archetypical woman is Angelina Jolie. Yes, he wants to marry eventually, but no one can live up to sexy Ang. How utterly formulaic:

‘For me, it is what is inside a woman that is important, although she must also be beautiful, like Angelina Jolie.’

‘Although the time is not right for me to have a relationship. Football is my life, that is my focus.’

Oh Cristiano, you mustn’t worry so much about such things. After all, a relationship with Posh certainly didn’t stop David Beckham from playing soccer.

Oh hell, never mind.

Thanx to Flea, who always has the best Ronaldo-oriented imagery but qualifies my appreciation as “There is a term for women tragically OBSESSED with gay men.” Oh, and he also adores Angelina Jolie as well. V. interesting.