Once upon a time, I would have told Jack White of the White Stripes to eat my shorts and have been completely serious in that regard. Of course, this would have been a few years ago, before he gobbled up poor little Renee Zellweger for breakfast one day and then proceeded to balloon to epic proportions. Despite being the coolest sellout of all time and Numero 17 on Rolling Stone’s 100 Greatest Guitarists Of All Time list, Jack White has really let himself go physically. What a damn shame.
Nevertheless, the White Stripes will guest star on the September 19th episode of The Simpsons, and apparently, Milhouse is one pissed off little bitch as shown in the above teaser photo. Speaking of guest stars, IGN has published their list of Top 25 Simpson Guest Appearances. I was pleased to see that Aerosmith’s Season III stint made the list (barely!), wherein they christened the Flaming Moe drink. The Numero Five guest appearance is a bit of a shocker, but that little tidbit is for you to pursue, should you accept the task.
Now let’s look at Jack White and proceed to ooh and ahh over his former studliness. If anyone sees him wandering about, tie his ass to a treadmill, would ya?
6 comments
I realize white is a trez kewl indie darling, but its really bullshit that finger wigglers like him get all this adulation while hard-working, innovative and truly amazing guitarists get totally ignored. I’m talking about your Rory Galleghers, your Robin Trowers, your Tommy Bolins here.
Maybe if they piped up with some liberal rant about how Bush, or some Republican sucked (Tommy and Rory’s case when they were alive) they would have gotten some props. Seems like that’s all it takes to be considered ‘serious’ and important.
Sorry to disagree with you, love your posts, but I think white sucks donkey balls as both a stylist and a technician. His seven nation army rants are trez chic in a che guevara rebellious punky edgy hip kind of way tho so he is a kewl kid even if he does play like his hand was slammed in a car door.
Poor old Rory only sang about Tattooed Ladies and Bullfrogs.
I daresay Meg is amply bosomed.
Perhaps he should change his name to Jack Black? Hmmm…
You’re onto something, bobgirrl.
Oh nooooo.
i wouldnt know a good guitarist from a bad one, but since i like the stripes, he probably sucks.
but meg is all the drummer i need, and she can bang on my head any day.
I don’t listen to White Stripes, and I quit watching the Simpsons when they became the SNL of cartoons.