I’m off to join the Atoz clan for our traditional Thanksgiving feast, but anyone who’ll be traveling for the holidays should give thanks they’re not sitting next to John “Johnny Rotten” Lydon, who can make even those TSA junk inspections seem comparatively less invasive and degrading. Such, at least, is the testimony of Jamiroquai frontman Jay Kay, who sat next to Lydon on a flight he’s unlikely to forget:

He [Lydon] is a f****** nuisance. I was seated next to him on a flight and the whole trip he just kept farting. It was totally foul. He kept saying, ‘Oh, that wasn’t me’ or, ‘The meal smells a bit off, don’t you think?’ He drove me insane.”

Continuing the Thanksgiving theme, some of my relatives can relate to this story, particularly anyone who’s sat next to Uncle Claude after he’s overindulged in the candied Brussels sprouts. At least, I think it was Uncle Claude. It certainly wasn’t me. And on that bugle-y note, happy Thanksgiving to all.