Despite a failed attempt to destroy the Denton empire, George Clooney now forges on to kick the paparazzi to the proverbial curb. Never mind that these photogs generally hang out in the gutters and curbs waiting for their prey, but let us not question George’s rationale as discussed in the October 10th edition of Vanity Fair:

“Here is my theory on debunking photographs in magazines, you know, the paparazzi photographs. I want to spend every single night for three months going out with a different famous actress. You know, Halle Berry one night, Salma Hayek the next, and then walk on the beach holding hands with Leonardo DiCaprio.

“People would still buy the magazines, they’d still buy the pictures, but they would always go, ‘I don’t know if these guys were putting us on or not.’”

Great plan, George. Yet we must uncover the gravaman of the statement. What you really want is to end up with Leonardo in the end. As to dating a different woman every night, the plan displays a certain amount of chutzpah, but not quite enough to make up for the overriding lacks of originality. We do certainly applaud you for the vain attempt to appeal to the proletariat, since it’s every man’s dream to suddenly awaken to an endless supply of willing women.

Good luck with that plan, buddy, because you’re not getting any younger. Tick tock, tick tock! Oh, and one more thing:

See also: George Clooney Hates The Internet