New Moon opened to big, big box office numbers last week, thereby guaranteeing a couple more years of sparkly-vampire infestations at your local theatre. It will not surprise you to learn that, of the millions of fans who flocked to see the thing, not a few were… a few clowns short of a circus, let’s say. Consider this guy, who posted on Missed Connections after one midnight screening of New Moon. It starts off normally enough, then gets distinctly creepy: “as your hair draped down behind your seat i just had to hold it and smell it deeply (pantene. great choice).” Then he goes full pervo retard and never looks back:

After the movie I followed you and your friend to perkin’s. I waited outside in my car so I could watch you eat and smile. I followed you home and made sure you got there safely. I noticed you left you car unlocked so I went to have a look into your life. I can tell by looking in your car that we have a lot in common. If you want your dash ornaments back you will have to meet me and we can have a great time getting to know each other. “grin”

Gamma Squad has the whole flesh-crawling exchange. Kids, there are very, very good reasons why you should never pick up total strangers at certain genres of movie. “Saw” movies would be one example, and evidently “Twilight” movies are another. Actually, I don’t care if you and your SO have been a couple for years. If this person wants you to see New Moon with them, you need to take a long, serious look at your relationship.