Certainly, nobody saw this one coming. Jennifer’s Body, starring the insufferable Megan Fox, was expected to land somewhere in the $14 million range for its opening weekend. Instead, this horror-comedy finished in fifth place with an estimated $6.8 million. It lost to the “Food Falling from the Sky” family movie, the “Matt Damon as a Fattie” movie, the newest “Tyler Perry in Drag” movie (and a holdover at that), and the latest mutation of “Jennifer Aniston is a Pathetic Singleton” movie.
While some people will see this as a significant dent in Diablo Cody’s otherwise shiny scriptwriting career, I don’t think Cody is to blame here. Instead, I’m fairly certain that theatergoers are just entirely sick of Megan Fox running her bitchy, unrepentant mouth and acting as if she’s indispensible to the Hollywood machine. Fox had better stop drawing ill-conceived Hitler analogies towards director Michael Bay, because, at this point, she needs him much more than he needs her in his next big-ass-robots movie.
Congratulations, Megan. You totally managed to out-Heigl Katherine Heigl and beat that bitch to her very own finish line!
In more positive news, Inglourious Basterds did manage to pass Pulp Fiction as Tarantino’s highest domestic grosser, despite the fact that this slacker still hasn’t made it to the theater. That’s a bingo!