From whatever reason, I was under the impression that a film featuring Jessica Alba as a blind character would hit theaters as a crappy romantic comedy, in which Alba’s Ass™ falls in love with an ugly dude and his equally ugly ass. Instead, it turns out that The Eye will be a crappy supernatural horror film, but I suppose any film starring Alba’s Ass™ is just as crappy and tasteless good as another.
In all fairness, the teaser trailer for The Eye did sort of make me jump (once) when I saw it in the theater last Friday. This flick is a remake of Jian Gui, which, naturally, is Hong Kong film because we’re stealing all the good shit from the Asian mindset. The storyline of both films revolve around a blind woman who receives a cornea transplant, and with it, she gets some free visual bonuses in the form of a supernatural creepshow. Apparently, the former owner of said cornea went through some really fucked-up experiences, and now we get to watch Alba’s Ass™ go through the same stuff. O happy day!
Actually, this also sounds like a larger-budget verion of an HBO film that I saw in the 80s, where some girl gets a brain transplant and has visions of being killed by a toaster (or hair dryer?) falling into the bathtub. After watching that one, I couldn’t eat peanut butter sandwiches for, like, a whole month or something. Good times.
A few more promotional photos for The Eye follow, and for the film’s creepy trailer teaser, hit the next page:
9 comments
I just took an ambien so there’s no way in hell I’m watching the trailer (I’m already tripping my face off), but this actually sounds somewhat promising. And not just because of Alba’s Ass.
I saw a Thai horror flick a couple years ago called “Shutter” … creepiest goddamn thing I’ve seen in years. Completely derivative, but the execution was flawless. Don’t think it’s ever been released here.
This movie looks horrible… no interest at all
Something like The Eyes of Orlac then.
I was wrong, it’s out on DVD here now:
http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0440803/
The hands of a murderer. Ha!
“…in which Alba’s Ass falls in love with an ugly dude and his equally ugly ass.”
Exsqueeze me? The construction of this sentence appears to suggest Jessica Alba has an “ugly ass”.
This grammatical construction is not allowed in English.
IT’s more like she has an “overrated ass” because for some reason Alba herself is nothing without it. Quite literally. She doesn’t know how to act but somehow she’s in movies because of her ass. Besides, it’s easy to be in a horror movie and not know how to act, just ask Tara Reid.
I saw The Eye, well the HK version, it’s actually quite good and spooky. I’d like to see that Thai one too (whoever mentioned it up there).
For whatever reason the Asians seem to be churning out the genuinely scary stuff for the past 10-15 years. (Possibly longer but I didn’t notice.) “Shutter” is sort of like The Ring crossed with The Sixth Sense. It has a lot of boo! moments but it will also screw with your mind for weeks afterwards.
There’s no real reason a US studio couldn’t put out a movie like this, but for whatever reason it isn’t happening. We’re having to make due with second-rate knockoffs of the real deal from Asia. My point is that putting Jessica Alba’s ass in them, IF quality can be maintained in other areas of the film (including acting), then this would at least represent some American contribution to the genre.
I will rent Jian Gui and see how it is, but the premise sounds solid by horror standards.