Run for the border bitches, just don’t forget the newspaper and pack of tucks, you’re gonna be incapacitated for a while. Greg Creed, el presidente of Toxic Hell, wants to capitalize on the one thing K-Fed might be able to get right.

Taco Bell has expressed interest in adding Federline to its stable of thinking-outside-the-bun staffers stuffers.

The chain’s president, Greg Creed, penned an open letter to Federline on Tuesday, offering him a job at the Taco Bell of his choice, along with the added enticement of his very own uniform and a custom “K-Fed” nametag.

I’m not quite sure how he can turn this down. I mean a customized Taco Bell uniform. Who wouldn’t want that? I know that’s what I lie awake at night dreaming of.

Well that and competing with K-Fed for parent of the year.

Federline first caught the attention of the Tex-Mex establishment last summer, when he shared his dream that his children would one day work at Taco Bell in an interview with Item magazine.

“My kids are going to have to learn what a real job is, what life is. You don’t have it easy with me. Period. My kids are going to work at Taco Bell, dammit,” the father-of-four was quoted as saying.

Though his assorted offspring are still too young to learn the complicated skills required for chalupa preparation, Federline now has the opportunity to lay the groundwork for their future employment prospects.

I realize it’s gonna be tough for me to win, but I’ll give it my best. Maybe if I strap the kid to the top of my truck for our daily commutes to day care I’ll at least be in the running. For the Federspawns future employment, if there’s one thing I’m sure they’ll be good at it’s stuffing the chalupa.

Admittedly, I’m kind of disappointed in my almost favorite pseudo-mexican restaurant. You’d think they’d have learned their lessons about spreading infectious diseases a couple of months back when they shared E. Coli with 39 people in New Jersey and New York. But no, apparently Taco Bell’s management has to kill of a couple of small townships before they’re satisfied.