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Tonight, the 2008 inductees will be inducted to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame at the 23rd annual induction ceremony in New York City. Stepping into these generally well-worn, vodka-stained shoes are Leonard Cohen, John Mellencamp, The Dave Clark Five, The Ventures, and, in a hurl-worthy display of the power of donation money chuztpah, Madonna.

Gag me with a Kabbalah bracelet. Madonna? Seriously, that bitch doesn’t even write most of her own songs. She picked up a guitar for, like, one live performance with Lenny Kravitz.

However, I am overjoyed to learn that Leonard Cohen will be inducted. While I could go on at great length about The Man — described by Prince Charles as “wonderful” and Bono as “our Byron” — the Daily Telegraph once gave a more succinct description as well as a summarization of Cohen’s current troubles:

His technique is awe-inspiring: few can make the tortured human condition beautiful in the way that Cohen does.

Leonard Cohen wants to retire. He can’t, for at least two reasons. One is that being Leonard Cohen is a lifetime commitment. How could we who adore him let him clock off? Another reason is that he doesn’t have any money.

In late 2004, Cohen discovered that he had $150,000 in his bank account, whereas he’d thought he had $5million. Throughout a labyrinthine legal process, he has accused his business advisers of gross financial mismanagement. He has since been awarded $9million, although he’s unlikely to end up with much of this; he’s had to remortgage his Los Angeles home to pay the court fees.

This pretty much sucks from any angle, but I think Cohen can catch up on some of these losses. He’s released a new book and has resumed touring. He also has royalties coming from several films that use his music in various capacities, so I think he’ll sorta recover from these embezzlements, which likely took place while he did the Zen Buddhist monk on top of a mountain thing. Most of all, Cohen will do this in his own particularly wry, sensual manner.

His voice isn’t as pure as some of those who have covered his songs, but that’s what makes it so powerful. To borrow the title of his 1966 novel, he is one of life’s “Beautiful Losers”; and his loss is our gain.

Then, there is the question of Madonna, who just won’t retire.

Previously: 2007 Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame Inductees: A Study In Awkwardness