Bloody hell, we’re positively chuffed to honor our antihero with a 2nd Pete-a-Palooza. Of course, we’re not exactly holding this extravaganza at the one year mark. Since the last Pete-a-Palooza commenced in April 2007, that would technically make us three months late. So, consider this akin to Pete Doherty showing up late to court, or perhaps this is an admission that we’ve accrued a serious backlog of Doherty-related news and piccies. A sincere effort shall be made to avoid any more of the Pete in the Buff or Grooming Doherty sort of pictures, but, hey, we’re not making any promises in that regard.

Let’s kick things off with some unsubstantiated Doherty rumours. Even though Pete Doherty and Amy Winehouse haven’t been hanging together since her last hospital stay, some clever idiot reported to the tabloids that Pete had tried out Amy’s new tanning bed “and hurt his eyes after refusing to wear safety goggles.” Next up is the unlikely report that Pete called a taxicab to hitch a ride from the front of his home to the back, so he’d have an easier time taking the rubbish out. Whatever.

Now, onto a wee bit of music gossip. Recently, fans have speculated that Babyshambles will soon split as a band, due to their failure to play their last few scheduled festival performances. One such absence includes the Werchter Festival in Belgium, where the band missed their scheduled set “between Slayer and Jay-Z shows.” Damn, these European rock festivals sure have turned into a horror show lately. Instead of running Oasis, Blur, and Pulp, which is what the audiences have come to expect, these festivals have booked Jay-Z and motherfucking Slayer? Yeesh, we’d seriously consider skipping out on such a gig as well, but while it’s easy to assign guilt to Doherty’s feline fetish, I seriously doubt that any cat could drag Pete away from a £60,000 payday. The more likely reasons for Babyshambles’ lack of dependability center around reports of “inter-band fighting” coincide with our recent coverage of Pete’s recent solo performance due to guitarist Mik Whitnall’s recent heroin overdose and general bullshit-related behavior. Who is Mik Whitnall, you ask? Exactly.