Alleged “heavy metal band” and “bunch of nauseatingly cheerful dorks,” Metallica, has done the previously unthinkable and autographed a damn sewing machine. This hideous spectacle, which most accurately be described as “The Thing That Should Not Be” or “Creeping Death,” is an unyielding sign that “The Four Horsemen” should pack up their pinking shears and retire to the nearest golf course. Do the right thing and contribute to Metallica’s demise by purchasing a raffle ticket.
Note To Lars Ulrich: Take out your dentures before you finish sucking off the RIAA.
Groupie Showdown: Sorry, Carla Bruni-Sarkozy, but Condi Rice wins this round.
Imagery: Photo via Jason Makapagal (at Flickr)
9 comments
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[...] by Stephen Green on 03 Dec 2008 at 10:43 am This item is so unbelievably wrong that I dare you to click without going all [...]
“Each ticket is $5 each”
Uh, nice.
Just when you think they can’t sink any lower …
I’m sorry, but that’s freaking hilarious. At least they don’t take themselves too seriously.
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At least they don’t take themselves too seriously.
Go ahead, rip one of their CD’s and see how seriously they take themselves…
If there is truly a Dark Lord, this machine will be in my possession.
http://www.quiltsryche.com
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