Mischa Barton had a couple of good years on The O.C. before her entire life turned into a Triple Decker Monster Thickburger of public humiliation. But that’s been going on for a while now, so at this point she probably wasn’t even particularly surprised to learn she’s become the face of a Chinese sex toy. The apparatus, described as “a vibrating, ring-shaped sex toy” (just go ahead and Google “vibrating ring sex toy” if you’re absolutely hell bent on pursuing this topic), was found on sale in a rural Chinese hotel, in a box featuring a picture of Ms. Barton trying to look sexy. When asked if Mischa was pursuing business possibilities focused on the rural Chinese penile dysfunction market, a spokesperson said, “Um. No. She’s not endorsing any such toy.”

Probably a smart move. This doohickey is a toy made in China, after all, so it would probably leak cadmium and white lead into your bloodstream while electrocuting the user in a manner that would render him useless to a woman. Best just to dodge all those products-liability lawsuits, lie back, and wait for the next public humiliation to arrive.