It’s time for you to take a three minute break from asking people if they’d like to super-size their order, hide the fries and get to making a video. Chances like this only come around once every couple of years, or so, and P. Diddy needs a bitch.

“If you feel you can be my assistant, I wanna know why you should be my personal assistant,” Diddy says in the recorded video. “What better job than that to have me scream at you, go crazy, keep you up late hours, have you sleep deprived… if this job interests you, upload your video interview why you should be my assistant.”

You guys can have at it, I’m holding out to be J.Lo’s nipple tweaker or the condom-hander-outer-guy stationed by Paris’ bedroom door.

But if I was going to post a video to Diddy’s bitch hunt, it’d look something like this: