Pete Doherty plans to endure public humiliation in order to prove to the world - and Kate Moss - that he’s not “The Weakest Link.” Indeed, Doherty has made a bid to the BBC that he should appear as a contestant on the game show because he was once a prodigous little chap who could mention Umberto Eco and Oasis in the same sentence. Our antihero pulled the crackpipe from his mouth to boast, “People might not realise it but I am well educated and well read. I can prove to people there is more to me than just drugs.”

While I could be mistaken, I do believe that Anne Robinson will rip off Pete’s head and shit down his neck. It’s just a hunch . . .