You’d never guess it just looking at her, but Amy Winehouse is quite a sloppy housekeeper. Surprising, I know. But, after being threatened with a lawsuit by the owner of the apartment she shared with model husband Blake Fielder-Civil, Amy is cleaning the place up, and a monumental job it is, too. Presumably the London Sanitation Department is already issuing haz-mat suits to the team of specialists who will have to collect Amy’s “boxes of junk, broken furniture, and a pile of discarded clothing,” not to mention less identifiable odds and sods.

While Amy is catching up on her spring cleaning for the years 2004 through 2008, she might want to consider some spring cleaning for her soul. Or a spiritual enema, whichever metaphor works best for you. And the man with the (metaphorical) bag of unpleasant little rubber doodads to get the job done is the Reverend Bob Larson of the Spiritual Freedom Church, professional exorcist:

Amy Winehouse is in my opinion possessed…. This is obviously just a long-distance diagnosis and I’m not passing judgment. But in her case there are a lot of similarities to possessed people. I would love 15 minutes with her to see whether I could help her.

Good luck with that plan, Rev. The spirit in control of Amy—and I’m guessing it answers to the name “Amy’s ragingly self-destructive ego”—isn’t nearly as wimpy as that Pazuzu grasshopper thingie that performed a hostile takeover of Linda Blair. A spirit that can drive its subject to grind out cigarettes on her face will need a stronger eviction notice than your run-of-the-mill exorcism. However, if you can expel the spirit, please send it to inhabit Angelina Jolie, or Sienna Miller, or someone else who could pull off satanic evil with a degree of style and flair. That would be a refreshing change of pace.