Madeline Zima: Temptress of “Californication.” (UMC)
Lilly Allen thought she was being original. (CS)
Hayden Panettiere does a great Amelia Earhart. (CB)
Reese Witherspoon: Amazingly candid in print. (POTP)
Cleaning C***ck : Better than no c***k at all. (IBBB)
Eliza Dushku can make women switch teams. (WIMB)
Katie Holmes pretends to have human emotions. (GB)
Heidi Klum goes cruising in the bra mobile. (PB)
Keira & Rupert share poses & cheekbones. (Ayyyy!)
Random Jonas Brother totally gets his mack on. (LAR)
Demi Lovato might have an expiration date. (CO)
Kanye West: Dude must be ill. He forgot the caps lock. (AG)
Jack Nicholson resurfaces for anger management. (SOMG)
The Five Best Works of Dick Literature: “The penis ejaculates yarns rich with metaphor…” (Pajiba)
