David Beckham has always been extraordinarily great at selling himself as a product rather than as a soccer player. In the past few weeks, David Beckham has gone from perpetual benchwarming for Real Madrid to a stunning improvement in his game. For the same duration of time, Victoria Beckham has engaged in a fruitless search, viewing 20+ Los Angeles mansions varying within $18 to $30 million range and simply cannot find a suitable fit for she, David, and their three sons.

As if on cue, Becks has made a miraculous recovery from his World Cup shame to “stak[ing] his case for an England recall with an inspirational display” that led Real Madrid to a weekend win of 3-2 over Bayern Munich. The man formerly known as Manchester United No.7 resurrected his famous foot by setting up three first-half goals. In response, or perhaps due to shock, Real fans collectively shouted in unison, “Beckham, Beckham” while David went on in the second half to earn descriptions not heard about him in quite some time, such as “intelligent pass,” “chase and round,” “with a ricochet before scoring,” and “vicious free-kick into the box.”

As always, his home country of England was watching Becks and has conveniently lost four consecutive matches. Although Beckham inked a $250 million deal to play for the Los Angeles Galaxy, the buzz is that Steve McClaren is seriously considering recalling him to England for next month’s Euro 2008 qualifiers:

We have four weeks before the squad is announced and we will see what happens in those four weeks.

It gives me a problem, one of the problems you welcome.

He’s being professional and performing well for his club – obviously that’s a problem I would rather have than not have. It’s interesting.

The founder of metrosexuality, also scornfully referred to as “Goldenballs” by some sports critics, responded in kind:

My ambition has never changed. I’ve always wanted to play for my country and will always be available.

It would seem that David Beckham still has a future with England’s set-up, and that future may very well be sooner than later. Hot damn, Victoria is gonna be pissed. All her dreams of movie stardom . . . poof!