Posting every time Britney embarrasses herself with another drunken, upchucking public appearance has become way too repetitive and depressing. Instead, here are a few lowlights from the last few eventful days of Miss Toxic’s downward spiral:
- Felicia Culotta, Britney’s personal assistant for the last nine years, has quit after deciding that her client’s career has well and truly left the building. “There’s just so much you can do to help a person,” Culotta said in an email. “I don’t dare want to be an enabler, and I cannot love her enough for the both of us. I cannot convince her in ANY way to love herself.” She also indicated that her attempts to get Brit to clean up her act had been less than well received.
- Luckily, Justin Timberlake is still ready to tell Britney what she needs to hear’very, very publicly, if necessary. Accepting a Brit Award (there’s irony for you) by satellite link to the UK, Justin thanked the audience and then said, “Everyone have a great night. Stop drinking! You know who you are. I’m speaking to you. You are going to get sloppy.” You can see the video here. I’m pretty sure that wasn’t a shout-out to his mom.
- Meanwhile, Britney is classing up her image with some weird phone sex thing in connection with hawking her Midnight Fantasy perfume. Click on the picture (the one at the link,) which couldn’t have been taken later than 2004) to set your phone fantasy in motion. You get to specify the name and gender of the person Britney calls, along with their favorite activities (e.g., “Hooking Up With Playas,” “Getting Pierced”) and various other options. When you finish, you get to hear Britney slurring her way through some suggestive bit of personalized naughtiness, plus a brief commercial message for that smelly stuff she’s selling.
And that’s all for now. Unfortunately, we all know there’ll be much, much more to come.
