Time Magazine was never a worthwhile source of information about current events, pop culture, or much of anything else, but for several decades the alternatives were so bad that Henry Luce and his successors could make a pretty good living inflicting their ignorant, half-baked opinions on millions of unsuspecting readers. These days, things are different. Gallons of information are just a few mouse-clicks away, and it’s increasingly apparent that Time is just USA Today on glossy stock. (Last year’s “Person of the Year” selection–that would be you, you devilishly atttractive guy or girl–was particularly lame.)
Right now Time is selecting “The Most Influential People of the Year,” and you’d be as logical a choice as anyone else on the list. The rankings keep changing, but right now the top three people are Steven Colbert (some cable entertainment guy), Shigeru Miyamoto (designer of Donkey Kong and The Legend of Zelda), and J. K. Rowling (children’s book author). The bottom three people are Kate Moss (model/coke whore), Paris Hilton (celebutard/coke whore), and Sergio Marchionne (CEO of Fiat/non-coke whore). Or maybe Kate, Paris and Sergio are the top and Steven, Shigeru and J. K. are the bottom. It makes about as much sense either way. Biologist Richard Dawkins is one step up from Perez Hilton and one step below Howard Stern. Moving up from John McCain you get Mullah Omar, Simon Cowell, and Rosie O’Donnell. The list reads like someone fed a year’s worth of US Magazine through a shredder, grabbed a random handful of the resulting confetti, and jotted down all the names. And the nominations from around the world suggest that Time’s readers are just fine with that.
One top contender here is Sanjaya Malakar, who’s currently ranked at #21 (five spots above Bill Gates). I;d suggest heading over to Time’s website and giving Sanjaya your vote. It would be a nice consolation for getting booted off AI, and judging from this list Sanjaya really is the kind of global cultural trendsetter we deserve.
