This Apocalypse Will be Brought to You by Kelso

By Mr. Atoz in Ashton Kutcher, Smoking Bolts

Ashton Kutcher

Ashton Kutcher has done some dumb things over the years (tweeting pictures of his wife’s butt springs forcibly to mind), and his movie and television projects have run the gamut from painful to flat-out excruciating. But Ashton is a serious man, getting ready for serious times. He said as much in an interview with Men’s Fitness, where the 32-year-old actor revealed that he is preparing for Armageddon. “You start taking out electricity and satellites, and people are going to lose their noodle,” he warned, and went on to reveal the steps he’s taking:

What happens when all our modern conveniences fail? I’m going to be ready to take myself and my family to a safe place where they don’t have to worry… All of my physical fitness regimen is completely tailored around the end… I stay fit for no other reason than to save the people I care about.”

So: Come the Apocalypse, most celebutards will die horribly, the survivors will live like the people in Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome, and Ashton Kutcher won’t be able to make any more movies. I’m sure there’s a downside to all this, but I’m just not seeing it.



6 comments

[...] Ashton Kutcher is ready for the Apocalypse – LINK [...]

12.29.10 | 4:25 pm

Who’s he kidding, really? Kutcher wouldn’t be able to last ten minutes without Twitter.

12.29.10 | 5:25 pm
jvon

If I understand this correctly, he is planning to take his family into the woods and chase down deer and kill them with his bare hands. I hope he remembers to pack some matches, at least.

12.30.10 | 1:25 am

[...] This apocalypse will be brought to you by Kelso AgentBedhead [...]

12.31.10 | 10:21 am

[...] Ashton Kutcher, bringer of the apocalypse (AgentBedhead) [...]

01.02.11 | 9:52 pm

[...] Ashton Kutcher, bringer of the apocalypse (AgentBedhead) [...]

01.03.11 | 1:15 am
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