Question: So, um, even when werewolves aren’t “wolfing out,” are they supposed to have waxed chests?
Answer: Only if these are Twilight werewolves.
The above photo, which initially caused much confusion before I remembered to disregard preexisting lycanthropic mythology, introduces audiences to the “wolf pack” from the upcoming New Moon film:
Unlike cold-blooded neck biters, these poster guys for animal magnetism are hot. So hot that their temperature runs a steady 108 degrees, as anyone who has read Stephenie Meyer’s series of gothic romances knows.
That gives them a great excuse to doff their shirts on-screen and expose the physiques they’ve been pumping up for playing werewolves in The Twilight Saga: New Moon, the sequel to last year’s supernatural sensation, due Nov. 20.
Well, even the presence of shirtless freaks doesn’t make me want to voluntarily watch this film, but whatever. Apparently, one of these “werewolves” is supposed to make a move on Bella (Kristen Stewart) when Edward (Rob Pattinson) takes a leave of absence. This makes me makes me wonder why the film would want to keep this part of the storyline, since the loss of the undead, unwashed lead hottie will undoubtedly upset Pattinson’s legion of fans.
As a side note, the upcoming sequel to 2007′s 30 Days of Night will also run into this sort of dilemma, since Josh Hartnett’s character, Eban, disappears for all but the end of the Return to Barrow graphic novel. The main difference between this series and the Twilight saga, however, is that the 30 Days of Night vampires are all kinds of creepy awesome.
P.S. My apologies for posting far too much male-oriented imagery around here lately. Gotta make up for that soon.