Pete Doherty Did Not Pee In A Trophy, Yo.

Yeah, we’re still talking about that Celebrity Six soccer match from last weekend. We do, however, concede that Doherty is not exactly the next Cristiano Ronaldo:

“Mr Doherty’s contribution to the match consisted of two free kicks which flew over the bar and almost falling over as he chased a long ball down to the right hand side. Doherty’s off-pitch performance was just as lively as he hurled abuse, mud and grass at The Sun team from the sidelines with his trademark trilby and fag in hand.”

After the game, Doherty was allegedly tossed from the premises after trying to pull a nasty prank. It’s well known that our antihero is a huge fanboy of the Queens Park Rangers team, and the Celebrity Six match was being held at one of the QPR’s rival stadiums, the Millwall FC’s New Den. That’s where the details get sketchy:

“Babyshambles were given access to the chairman’s office so the attention surrounding Pete wouldn’t get in the way of all the other guests. One of the security guards was tipped off that Pete was trying to take a trophy. When he checked it out he found that Pete wasn’t nicking it, he was filling it up. He is a huge QPR fan and thought it would be a laugh to leave a little surprise.”

Now, the problem with this story is that it was published by The Sun, who just happened to send a team of its own to play in the Celebrity Six match. This was considered something of a grudge match between the tabloid & the junkie. Besides, all that Doherty sweat probably left him with no need to take a leak. So, although most folks will believe this story, sorry to disappoint those wanting to visualize Pete Doherty in all his manly glory, but it’s probably not true.

Now, the sort of story that The Sun won’t publish would include anything Doherty-related with a good samaritan angle. Apparently, Pete took pity on a fan, who was considered too inebriated by door staff and didn’t make it into one of his shows:

“Me and my mates decided to have a drink before the gig but the stewards refused me entry. I saw a cab pull up at the stage door and realised it was Pete arriving for the gig. I shouted his name and he looked round so I told him I couldn’t get into the gig. He shook my hand and when I opened it there was a £s;20 note in it. It made my night.”

Of course, this only tells us Doherty has a soft spot for those under the influence. Bloody hell!

UPDATE: We have a confirmed denial of prankster trophy urination, according to a statement on the Millwall FC website:

Contrary to a newspaper report today, Pete Doherty would be more than welcome back at The Den following his first ever visit to the ground on Sunday.
Doherty joined around 150 celebrities including McFly, Tony Hadley and former Lion Terry Hurlock, who took part in the annual Soccer Six tournament to raise money for the Samaritans.
And although his team, consisting of fellow members of the group Babyshambles, were beaten 3-2 in a thrilling final with Faithless, the 29-year-old had a great time.
Babyshambles manager Andy Boyd said: “Pete really enjoyed the event and his day at the club and passes on his thanks to all the staff at Millwall.”

Hey, we know a fake Doherty story when we see one. He may be a junkie, but he’s our junkie, mates.