Amy Winehouse won’t be performing at Glasto this year, and Lily Allen appears to have cleaned things up a bit. In that regard, thank goodness for Lady Gaga, her weird-ass wardrobe, and that painful-looking wedgie. Otherwise, someone might accuse the festival of turning into a somewhat classy event.

The largest annual British musical festival, Glastonbury Festival 2009, has officially kicked off, and Lily Allen performed her Friday gig while wearing a spacey purple wig and an outfit that shows off her newly toned arse. Of course, I’m not really sure how she keeps her tits from popping out of that top, but that’s [...]

To kick things off, have you checked out Adam Ficek’s Roses Kings Castles yet? The album is dominating my iPod, mates, and it comes highly recommended. Now, onto the bullocks.
For certain, it’s a bad week to be an English rock star. This first bit of news is truly bizarre and comes from Alison Mosshart of [...]

Bloody hell, we’re positively chuffed to honor our antihero with a 2nd Pete-a-Palooza. Of course, we’re not exactly holding this extravaganza at the one year mark. Since the last Pete-a-Palooza commenced in April 2007, that would technically make us three months late. So, consider this akin to Pete Doherty showing up late to court, or [...]

Oh, bloody hell. The Daily Mirror exclusively (!) reports that the 10-month relationship between Kate Moss and Jamie “Hotel” Hince may very well be over. According to some anonymous source, the couple had a blazing row over some groupie-associated nonsense, and Hince was later spotted moving his crap out of Kate’s home on Saturday afternoon. [...]

Technically, this isn’t a “blind item,” but creating a “mystery ass” category just doesn’t feel quite right.
This ass now appears as a result of this morning’s joke that, unfortunately, resulted in a challenge. Incidentally, that’s how most of my embarrassing stories begin. Yet I digress.
So, feel free to make your guesses on the owner [...]

Glastonbury Mascot Kate Moss: Two Years, Two Trilbied Boyfriends
Let’s be honest here — you won’t give a shit about this story because it’s mostly about Pete Doherty. In fact, this story will be largely passed over in favor of a picture of somebody’s ass that we’ll probably post later on today. That’s the nature of [...]

Bloody hell, mates. This morning, I scribbled some nonsense on the keyboard about Pete Doherty and proceeded to set off merrily for an appointment. Upon my return, it seems the little bugger has finally landed himself back in prison.
A funny thing happens sometimes when one sticks up for an underdog — both of you generally [...]