The shoes of dead people never wear out, and neither do stories about trying to market them. It’s been nearly a year since Courtney Love went ballistic about Doc Martens’ attempt to use her late husband’s image in an ad campaign; a rep said, “It’s outrageous that a company is allowed to commercially gain from such a despicable use of her husband’s picture.” What really put Courtney’s knickers in a twist, as Celebitchy points out, was her despicably nonexistent cut from the deal. But, for whatever reason, Courtney isn’t at all offended by Converse’s Kurt Cobain Specials. In fact, she even authorized them—the first branded product using Kurt’s name that Courtney has authorized as executrix of the Cobain estate.

In fairness, Kurt was a much bigger fan of Converse than he ever was of Doc Martens. In fact, Kurt was wearing a pair of Black One Stars when he made his final exit. So wearing Kurt Cobain Converse is almost like an homage. A really creepy, stupid homage. The rest of Kurt’s Massive Headwound ensemble, including the shotgun, will have to be purchased separately.

Courtney Love, aka “the grunge version of Yoko Ono,” has found yet another way to endear herself to her hordes of fans. The largely talent-free trainwreck has signed on as an executive producer for a planned Kurt Cobain biographical film based on Charles Cross’ biography Heavier than Heaven. Courtney’s attorney Howard Weitzman is another executive producer, just to make sure this puppy is nailed down tight.

Not that Courtney has any reason to expect problems. The later portions of Cross’ book were widely viewed as a collaboration between Cross and Courtney, and one friend of Kurt’s described it as “the Courtney-sanctioned version of history.” Also, the book is being adapted for the screen by David Benioff, whose previous ventures into biographical screenwriting include the eagerly awaited X-Men Origins: Wolverine. So we’re unlikely to see a repeat of the problems that led Courtney to crush Nick Broomfield like a bug when he suggested that Courtney was a less than model wife in a less than storybook marriage. And, after all, a sanitized and highly favorable screen bio is all Courtney needs to clear up her image problems, isn’t that right?

Remember the Kurt Cobain lunchboxes that Courtney Love so eagerly endorsed?

We look forward to the inevitable Pete Doherty lunchbox set with detachable syringe and tourniquet. The items in the above image can be purchased at wickedcoolstuff.com - While Supplies Last!

Less than a month ago, the Doc Martens adverts featuring Kurt Cobain doing it on a cloud went into heavy rotation. Then Courtney Love got offended that Kurt’s image was exploited or some such nonsense, so the ads were pulled. What Courtney was really angry about was that she wasn’t making any money off said exploitation of her dead husband, but now she’s happily making money by licensing a similarly tasteless use of Kurt’s likeness on lunchboxes:

Courtney Love has infuriated Kurt Cobain loyalists after she sold his face to lunchbox manufacturers.

According to Variety magazine the 42-year-old has reportedly licensed National Entertainment Collectables Association (NECA), allowing them to make lunchboxes, action figures and even small liquor flask key chains with the singer’s image on.

This may actually be old news pushed into orbit by a new license or a need for publicity, because we found the action figure seven months ago. Did Courtney already spend the $50 million she received by selling 25 percent of the Nirvana catalogue last year?

Suddenly, imitation Nikes made in Chinese slave labor camps are sounding comparatively hip. Doc Martens, the footwear of choice for Nineties grungesters and grunge wannabes, is ready to roll with a new ad campaign in the UK featuring various dead rockers in the guise of angels wearing big, clunky boots. So far, the Doc Martens people are planning to feast on the corpses of Kurt Cobain, Joe Strummer, Joey Ramone and Sid Vicious (pictures of the artwork for the ad campaign at the link). Ironically, it’s been thirty years since National Lampoon nearly got sued for running a fictitious VW ad exploiting Mary Jo Kopechne, but as usual if you wait long enough, reality turns out to be a cheap imitation of comedy. A more appropriate campaign for the Doc Martens people might feature circling vultures in little tiny bird boots.

Next up: Courtney Love as the fresh-as-a-daisy spokesgirl for Summer’s Eve.

Clint Eastwood has joined the ranks of Hollywood men who receive plastic surgery. (CityRag)

Penelope Cruz is a better actress when working in Spanish than English. (Pajiba)

Salma Hayek’s dog saved her boobies on the morning of The Golden Globes. (Celebitchy)

Ewan McGregor has been handpicked by Courtney Love to play the late Kurt Cobain. (The Evil Beet)

Britney Spears is not pregnant, according to her manager who apparently had her pee on a stick. (Glitterati)

Finger Soccer: Just as gay as the original. (Curmudgeonly & Skeptical)

As the Agent posted this morning, paleo-emo rocker Kurt Cobain has finally pushed Elvis off the post-mortem porcelain throne where The King has been reigning as the world’s #1 hot/sexy/dead money machine for the last three decades. Most of of Kurt’s earnings since his apparent suicide have been devoured by Courtney Love (aka the Money Hole), who, as Agent Bedhead noted, has been something less than frugal. Now Defamer has caught up with Courtney at the Borat premiere (where Courtney managed to fall asleep, a feat that ought to have been impossible for the chemically unenhanced), and noticed that the aging drug monkey/grunge vampire is sporting an impressive new set of fun-bags. And that’s actually clever, because a pair of artificial boobs are just what Courtney needs to divert people’s attention from her other image problems that, if enumerated, would keep us all here for the rest of the day.

Forbes.com: Top-Earning Dead Celebrities In The Past 12 Months

1. Kurt Cobain $50 million
2. Elvis Presley $42 million
3. Charles M. Schulz $35 million
4. John Lennon $24 million
5. Albert Einstein $20 million
6. Andy Warhol $19 million
7. Dr. Seuss $10 million
8. Ray Charles $10 million
9. Marilyn Monroe $8 million
10. Johnny Cash $8 million
11. J.R.R. Tolkien $7 million
12. George Harrison $7 million
13. Bob Marley $7 million

Although Kurt Cobain died on April 5, 1994 at age 27 as an apparent suicide, he technically tops the list of top-earning dead famous people. In actuality, it was Kurt’s widow, Courtney Love, who received the fruits of Kurt’s artistry. After Courtney spent many millions on drugs and paid her dog walker a $100,000 salary, she was forced to get off her ass and sell a 25% stake in the Nirvana song catalog. Primary Wave is the New York publishing joint that happily paid Courtney $50 million for its share in Kurt’s future wealth, which includes approximately 1.1 million units sold in the U.S. each year from the Nirvana catalog alone. In addition, Kurt’s image and likeness sells in the form of tasteless action figures (below left). Nice.

Courtney visibly enjoys the role of the long-suffering rock n’ roll widow, and she recently even posed with a lookalike of her dead husband. It seems almost impossible that she was never considered a suspect in the death of her husband considering all of the unanswered questions surrounding Kurt’s death. Yet while Courtney continues to live the life of a multimillionaire, she can rest assured that images of Kurt’s alleged suicide note (below center) along with the suspect document found in her backpack (below right) remain on the internet.

Scans of the above documents courtesy of Justice For Kurt