Gwyneth Paltrow appeared on The Tonight Show last night, which isn’t the only reason I didn’t watch it but ranks pretty high on the list. At any rate, it’s impressive that Gwyneth was able to squeeze an interview with Conan into her busy schedule, because judging from the way she was greased up she planned to swim the English Channel the moment they finished taping. You can watch a video of the interview here, if you insist. But keep in mind: This is Gwyneth Paltrow, yammering for six solid minutes about whatever passes through her empty little head. Probably best to watch with the sound off, and spend the time speculating about how an alleged vegan like Gwyneth could achieve that look without using an entire pound of raw bacon.