Robert Pattinson might (allegedly) be the most visually appealing member of the Bedhead Hall Of Shame, but do be careful to just look not touch . . . or smell either. After Rob’s recent admission that he only shampoos once every six weeks, it comes as little surprise to receive confirmation from Ted Casablanca that Rob Pattinson’s a Dirty Boy–and Not Like That!

We got word from people hotly preparing to work up in Vancouver for New Moon that Rob P. causes quite the commotion on set. No, not from sneaking Kristen Stewart into his trailer. It’s much, much dirtier, folks…

“He stinks. I mean, it’s awful. He never showers, and it drives people on the set crazy,” dishes someone who works in very close quarters with Pattz. Apparently our shaggy-haired love never rinses that bod of his, as Keanu and Brad have famously not done, as well, during extended periods of their hunky lives. Like, ever. And it’s past the point of a little BO. “He completely reeks,” complains an annoyed crewmember.

So, in addition to desperately needing a bottle of shampoo, the fellow needs to be thoroughly saturated with heavy-traffic carpet cleaner. After letting it soak in for fifteen minutes, a swift vacuuming will probably dislodge the visible dirt, but then there’s the problem of teaching the guy how to properly bathe. Any, uh, volunteers?

No one, and I mean no one sends hate mail quite like the spurned fans of Robert Pattinson, so this could get interesting. At least, I hope this round of letters demonstrates slight intelligence, for I might actually publish a letter or two if they didn’t require so much bloody time to figure out whether the spelling errors are some sort of hip, postmodern commentary upon the language barrier or just a symptom of one-handed typists who’ve exposed themselves only to really shitty vampire literature.

Thanx to Little Trees.